WienerBites Blog Has Arrived!

Oh, my dog! My blog has officially arrived! It took Mom forever to get it done, but it's here and now I finally have enough room to say what I want! I love my twitter, but that 140 character limit was killing me! I'm a Wiener with a lot to say, ya know!

Okay, first things first. Mom told me that if I had a blog, I absolutely could not misspell stuff like I've been doing on twitter. I informed her since I didn't have thumbs, she needs to take another look at exactly who was doing the typing! She just shook her head at me and walked away. I think I got her!

So, for those of you who don't know me (like maybe five people in the entire world!), my name is Jazzy the Amazing Wiener! Well, actually my name is Jazzy or Jazz. Sometimes it's Baby Girl. And sometimes it's Damn Dog (be forewarned, this is a PG-13 blog. Sometimes I might say the D-word, but that's all. Mom said I have a dirty mouth. I told her to kiss my patootie!).

Anyway, back to the story...

Officially, my real name is Jadzia Dax of Poogie. Now, could we just stop a minute and discuss parents who name their kids really weird stuff? And yes, I am my Mom and Papa's kid, so for the non-dog people who take issue with this word usage, first off, why are you reading my blog?! And secondly, maybe I don't walk on two legs, but I am my Mom and Papa's kid! Note to readers: my even weirder family history of Mom and Papa will also be explained soon. It's an Arkansas thing!

Now, where was I? Oh, yeah...

I mean, come on ~ Jadzia Dax of Poogie?! What kind of name is that?! Do you have any idea the humiliation I have gone through, knowing I'm named after some Star Trek character?! The dogs in the neighborhood have had a field day with it! "Oh, oh, beam me up, Jazzy!" or "Make it so, Jazzy!" or "Got your phaser on stun, Captain Jazzy?!" Please!!!

The rest of my name is my Papaw's nickname when he was a kid, so I'm not too grumpy over that!

However...

Why couldn't Mom have named me Angelina Jolie the Hottest Wiener Around? or maybe Sandra The Butt-kicking Wiener Bullock? or even Paula Deen the Best Cooking Wiener Ever! At least she didn't name me Princess or Fluffy or one of those frou-frou names. I am not a frou-frou dog, for cryin' out loud! (No offense to any Princesses or Fluffys, but we're not just fluffy material!)

But I digress...

I guess my name's not half bad after all because, for one, I am a jazzy little dog!

Well, since this is my first blog post, I don't wanna wear you out reading, so come back again soon and I'll tell you my birth story next.

Until then, this is Jazzy the Amazing Wiener signing off!